Ask Me Anything Answers: Adoption Standards

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This “Ask Me Anything” series is answering the questions and topics that you said you want to read about on the blog. As we move forward, please feel free to leave additional questions in the comments section of answer posts or regular posts. Today’s question has two parts, which I will be answering one after the other:

Do you think it’s better to rigorously screen all potential adopters in order to make sure that each pup is adopted into exactly the right home for him/her? Or is it more important to get as many dogs out of shelters and into homes as possible, even if a portion of them then end up getting returned?

This is a really great question.  If you ask the entire animal welfare community, the opinions on how much we should screen adopters would probably be pretty split. Some people think any home is better than the shelter, and some people think you must make the absolute perfect match for your animals, not lowering your standards one bit.

In this day and age, progressive shelters (note that I say shelters, not rescues – rescues are generally a little different than shelters) are moving more towards having open conversations with adopters, rather than a “prove to me why we should give you this dog” approach. I LOVE that. Lots of shelters are doing away with the traditional “home visit” and spending more time talking with adopters and getting a feel for if the animal is a right fit or not. Many people, especially who have been in this field for a long time, do not feel comfortable with letting go of home visits. They are worried we’ll be sending pets to hoarders or dog fighters (I’m sorry I just have to roll my eyes here, but that’s for a different post). But the truth is that we can’t control every single little detail of an animal’s new home. Furthermore, we have to put some trust in our adopters that they will do what is right to help make the transition smooth and give the animal the best life possible.

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I know a lot of you are shaking your head thinking, “but all the animals I have seen returned because the adopter gave up!” I agree with you. I agree that there are adopters out there who are just duds and who do not want to try their hardest to make it work with the animal. But there’s a good chance that there was an opportunity to either uncover that or work through it during the pre-adoption “counseling” session. Humans tend to be pretty transparent, and if you have an honest conversation with someone it is likely that you’ll be able to get a sense if they are interested in a particular pet for the right reasons. There will also be situations where that would happen no matter how much screening you did or did not do. It’s just life.

To answer the individual question directly: I think there should be a balance. I have lots of experience in “choosing” homes for each of my fosters. Because they were my fosters and I know them very well, I was able to tell someone right off the bat if they could possibly be the right fit or not. I had to be very careful, however, that I was not being too picky. It’s tough to do when you love your animals so, so much and you want the best for them and you think you have the best picked out in your mind – but the truth is that life is not perfect and somewhere something has to give if you don’t want to keep your foster pets forever (I see you, foster failures ;-)). None of my adopters have looked “perfect” on paper, but there’s so much more to the big picture than that. Besides, now all of their new families absolutely are perfect for them. What if I hadn’t given them that chance?

Adopted1What do you say to people outside the animal rescue community who complain that it’s too difficult or the requirements are too strict to adopt a dog, so they think it’s better just to buy instead?

I tell them I feel their pain! I think it totally sucks when shelters or rescue groups make adopters jump through flaming hoops. I agree that there should be standards and pets should not be adopted to just anyone, but I think we are doing ourselves a huge disservice when we make it easier to buy a dog than adopt one.  I sit here and preach about how people should look into breed-specific rescues, but then the rescue groups laugh in their face when they inquire about adopting because they do not meet the group’s “standards.” No, not all groups are like this. There are some really fabulous, flexible ones out there. But there are also some pretty rude, stuck up ones, which I think is a huge shame.

The bottom line is that I think it’s time we start putting a little more power in the hands of our adopters. Instead of trying to make it impossible for someone to adopt a dog, how about we pair them with a good match and then give them the resources to succeed! This is huge – I think we would have less returns if we made post-adoption help more readily available, including health advice, training resources and even just someone being available to walk them through the transition, should they need it.

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Shelter workers are looking to put ourselves out of business. We are never going to do that though if we have the outlook that it is a privilege for people to adopt from us. Sending good matches out the door (note: “good” means the pair is safe for the community!) with resources should take priority over sending perfect matches out the door, in my opinion. It doesn’t take much to turn good into perfect before long anyway!

Nothing Says It’s Almost Valentine’s Day Like. . .

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. . . a fabulous love-tastic photo shoot of adoptable animals!

I had the pleasure of working with the extremely talented photographer Virgil Ocampo again last night (the same volunteer that took these amazing shots of adoptables a few weeks ago). We were taking pictures for an exciting upcoming Valentine’s Day event at the shelter, and we took the opportunity to go all out with cute pink and red props.

I absolutely love Valentine’s Day. I love the chance to celebrate love and to show the people I love in my life a little bit of extra appreciation for a day.  That meant that I had a total blast with this shoot. I can’t wait to show you all the photos! Here’s a little behind the scenes action. . . stay tuned!

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A Visit With Otis!

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I have been missing Otis a lot the past three weeks. His new dad stays in touch with happy updates, questions, silly pictures, etc. – which I absolutely love. One day in between pictures of Otis stealing pillows and stories of his other silly antics, R brought up that I should come visit.

Of course I wanted to visit Otis. I’ve been wanting to see him since ten minutes after he got adopted. But I know he’s in a sensitive transition time, and I don’t want to confuse him or mess up his progress. R continually assured me that he thought Otis would be fine because he had adjusted so well and seemed pretty settled in. I agreed to stop by exactly three weeks after Otis went to this new home.

I was still torn on how I wanted the visit to go. Selfishly, I wanted Otis to be as excited to see me as he always has been – but a more sensible side of me wanted the opposite. You see, when Otis was with me last summer I watched him interact with his previous owner after I’d had him for about two weeks. He acted like he had never met that person in his life; he was totally indifferent towards him. I took this to mean that Otis could only be attached to one person at a time. Therefore, if he was very happy to see me when I visited him, I was worried it would mean he wasn’t attached to R yet. So I was ready for anything.

When I stopped by, R and Otie were in the garage working on cars. As I walked up, Otis started to act like he would if I was a stranger: backing up, some barking – I’d seen it all before. I crouched down and said, “Hi you big scary guard dog,” and that is when he recognized me – and totally lost it. He went ballistic and was so excited to see me, just like before. In that moment, I was the happiest foster mom of all time. Here was my foster dog, who I have been missing so much, acting like he’s missed me just the same. It was amazing. Then, my fears about Otie’s adjustment were extinguished as Otis ran up to R as if he were saying, “Look who came to visit!” It was the cutest thing of all time.

The reunion explosion continued for about five minutes and ended with Otis running back and forth between me and R in excitement. We took the party into R’s place and posted up on the couch. Otis immediately plopped himself in between us, doing his usual overbearing face-kissing routine alternatively to me and R. R and I caught up and talked about all things Otis, while Otie finally settled down and snuggled up between us.

If I could have written up the best outcome for a post-adoption visit with Otis, this would have been it. I got to see for myself just how happy he is with R. They are such a great pair, going everywhere and doing everything together. R seems to have become just as attached as I was (yay! yay! yay!).

They’ve got their routine down, and Otis is right at home. So much of Otie’s quirks and personality that I came to know also show up in the things him and R do together.

In fact, there were a few things that stood out, showing just how secure Otis now feels around R. He’s doing zoomies and he’s being brave enough to meet (and play with!) the shy little dog next door.

One of the best indications of progress is how much obedience training he and R have been working on together – and they haven’t even gone to a class yet. R has gotten Otis very good at focusing on him, and they’re mastering many of the basics. R has even taught Otis how to catch treats in his mouth. This may seem like a no brainer for a dog, but let me tell you – Otis really struggled with this when he was with me. It just didn’t occur to him to catch the treat, and would let it hit him in the head every single time. Look at how well he and R work together (disclaimer: the usual squealing occurs in this video):

I’m beyond glad that I listened to R and went to visit Otis. I got to experience the best of both worlds: Otis recognized me, and yet he very clearly loves his new life.

Reason #7038334 to foster!

Dear Otis

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Hey Stinker.

So, you’ve gone and found yourself yet another home. Third time is a charm, right? I am crossing all of my fingers and toes that this one will stick and that your new dad will appreciate you like I do (which he seems to!).  After spending four wonderful months with you, I still cannot believe it took you so long to find your forever home. Luckily, though, it seems I am learning time and time again that good things come to those who wait. You’ve finally got yourself a really good thing, Oats.

Your story is different than the others I’ve helped because this time it was all up to me. While I have many online supporters, parents who love you just like I do, and friends who cheered for me and you the whole way – I started this journey to find you happiness in July 2011 and, a year later, it was my job to finish it.

You made it very clear you knew that fact from the beginning by attaching to me like you were some orphaned child who finally found their mother (oh wait, I guess you were…). Your hopeless devotion to me was a bit overwhelming at times but overall quite endearing, and it made you stand out to me from my other fosters. Sure, you were extra needy when we were together, but you made up for it ten times over by having zero separation anxiety and behaving beautifully whenever I was away.  You were, in my eyes, the perfect dog.

It quickly became clear to me that others would not be as fortunate to know your true self. You loved me so, so much that you barely had the time of day for anyone else. You warmed up to my mom and dad, but even FosterDad didn’t get much more than a quick acknowledgement when he came around. This made it hard to show everyone else just how perfect you were. But it was okay, because I knew that anyone who was good enough to have you would recognize your shyness around others as just fierce loyalty to your person – a characteristic to be envied.

I wrote a post a few days ago about my realization of just how different you are from the day I brought you home. It was bittersweet because when I was writing that post I already knew you had found a new family, and I knew you would temporarily be set back in your progress.  But you simply couldn’t stay with me forever, even though you (and maybe me, too) wanted it.  Your new owner is the best of the best for you, and I know he will help you through this transition with understanding and gentle guidance.  I wish I could be there with the two of you to help as well, but it’s time for you and your new dad to figure things out on your own because you’re his now, not mine.

When I started this note I really didn’t intend for it to be sad or emotional because you, Otis, are far from that. You are goofy, happy, silly, expressive, sweet, and cuddly – and this journey with you has been all of those positive emotions rolled into one. You were one misunderstood pooch, and I’m happy I got the chance to turn things around for you.

Good luck in your new life, Otie! May you finally find joy and happiness in all you do.

Otie’s Hobbies

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Honey Bunches of Otis has some favorite hobbies. While he does most of them on a regular basis, I can only capture a few on camera.

One is wrapping himself in comfy bedding, creating a “dog in a blanket.” He wasn’t pleased that I caught him in the act.

The other is watching TV with us. This particular night it was Top Gear, one of his favorites. He and Fosterdad really enjoyed watching it together. You can see how focused he is.

Things that Otie really doesn’t like? Going to the vet.

He had a little ear infection which is luckily all taken care of now, but he sure wasn’t pleased about being in that office! I was very proud of how well he did in his exam though. He was only comfortable letting the doctor work on him if he had his paw on the vet’s knee. It was the cutest thing ever, and I was one proud Fostermama watching him take his check up like a champ.

I love his silly hobbies and his silly milestones. I can’t wait for someone else to enjoy them though – and for the rest of his life.

For more information on adopting Honey Bunches of Otis, go to his Adopt Me page to learn more about him and how to get in touch.

Updates From My Former Foster Half-Brothers and Sisters

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Fostermama has been passing along updates all week from the parents of the foster dogs she had before me. I realized that since we’ve all at some point had this here same mama, I think that makes us halfsies! Half-brothers and half-sisters that is.

Former foster half-sister Zabora, now known as Medivka, recently became a big sis to a HUMAN baby! While that sounds like my absolute worst nightmare, I wish her the best of luck listening to that screaming all the time enjoying life with her new sibling. I know fostermama misses Z/M a lot, so this update was super exciting.

THEN she got a few wonderful emails from the forever mom of my former foster half-brother Baxter. His mama was gushing about how well he’s doing, including this happy tail:

“Ok, so in the same vein, I have to tell you that Bax is just totally becoming a part of our little unit. He reveals more and more of his personality every day. And it’s not just me saying it. Diane’s noticing it too. It’s been very gradual and I feel like he was just kind of hanging out and observing us for the first five or six weeks, but he has really opened up and is just being so incredibly sweet that it’s like being around a totally different dog than just a month ago! We don’t have him crated anymore, just separated, and he’s doing great. He’s a very sweet and loving little guy :)”

When fostermama got that email she did a big happy dance and stared at these pictures for awhile, especially that first one. Even I will admit that is one handsome devil. Did you know I actually met the Bax when he first came into the shelter over the summer, before I went to my most recent attempt at a forever home? We took some dog test together and both passed – musta been because we totally ignored each other. That was the first time fostermama ever met Baxter too, but on that day she had no idea how much he would affect her life.

She talks a lot about how she misses that dog, then I nudge my nose into her hand and remind her that I’M here and I love her just as much as he did. She smiles and gives me a hug and seems happy again.

To top it all off, my almost sorta kinda former foster half-sister Curious Georgia’s forever parents have a friend that just took in the famous Stevie Wonder as a foster – go check them out and see how she’s doing!

What a great week of happy updates and team work!

While fostermama misses all of her former fosters, I know she is still happy to have me around. I keep her company every night on the couch while we blog. She is going to miss me a lot when I leave, just like she does the rest. That’s not stopping us from searching for my forever family though! If you know someone out there looking for a laid pack pooch who likes snuggling and playing in the yard, have their people call my people. . .

For more information on adopting Honey Bunches of Otis, go to his Adopt Me page to learn more about him and how to get in touch.

Cuteness Overload for Your Monday: Children & Pit Bulls Part 2

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I know many of you have seen this video already, but I wanted to share it for those who haven’t. It’s a video that The Unexpected Pit Bull, an organization dedicated to supporting the rescue, education, and advocacy of pit bulls, created after a news station ran a story about what dog breeds don’t do well with kids, putting pits on the list.

The video is a compilation of photos sent in by fans all over the country of pit bull type dogs with children. It’s adorable and makes you feel all warm and fuzzy. It is so heartwarming as it demonstrates that what matters is the individual dog, not the breed.

Definitely a nice way to start off Monday, even if you’ve seen it before. A picture I took of adoptable Dahlia even made its way in there towards the end. Enjoy!